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Where do I start? Well I’ve read my step 3 out to my sponsor. It was the best step so far for me. This step taught me one of the best things about recovery so far – self will and how it makes me ill. I have no qualms about having a higher power of my understanding because, to be honest he has done a lot better job of running my life since I came to NA and surrendered, than I ever have.
I understand people will be reading this and have theire anti NA views, but as I’ve said in my past blogs this works for me and has give me answers to my addiction problems. I respect other recovery models and how they work for others.
Once I read this step out I felt a feeling I’ve never felt before and it is so odd. I think it’s peace or something like that. My sponsor called it serenity and because I haven’t felt it before it felt weird.
That self will stuff has made me sick over the last month. It has even giving me headaches made me act out in ways such as obsessive compulsive and ungrateful. I haven’t given in and used and that has been a miracle. At times as it has been so stressful, but I’m glad as I feel I can cope with life’s problems and tests.
I am honestly truly glad to see the back of January. I’m hoping, and going to be praying, that I will be doing my higher power’s will for February. Because I can’t carry on like this – it’s doing my head right in.
Thank you for reading and your comments on my last blog. I was truly grateful.
Mark B :-D
Read about Mark’s experiences of step 1 in Today’s the day and Feeling relieved and free. He also talks about step 2 and his feelings after completing it (editor).
Mark, this is brilliant. I have put links at the end of your blog to your Step 1 and Step 2 experiences, for those who are new to the site and want to read from the start of your journey.
It is such a privilege to feel part of this journey with you. Thank you so much
Pucker Mark with blog, many thanks in opening to his site and letting me read your journey.
Personally, Mark! anyone thinking or commenting about “Anti NA” let go of it, that is their stuff and their problem. it works for you and that is what counts, we addicts do not have the right to be judgemental on others recovery and what works for us.
You are doing PUCKER, hold fast to that Mark. Keep it as simple as you can and just take care of you and your needs.
Thanks Mark. Your attitude of gratitude speaks volumes about where you are in your recovery. A combination of NA and AA works for me. Just for today, I’ll keep close to those who are walking the walk, like you.
All the best,
Keiran
Nice one Mark. I understand the working step guide in NA can be quite grueling at times. I take my hat off to you. My sponsor described doing the NA steps like taking a razor blade to yourself! (jokingly of course!). It really opens you up. Sounds like you’re doing just that from reading your latest blogs.
Love and Light
Phil
Love these blogs, Mark
Mark, I’m pleased you’ve found the steps working for you and that you’ve got the positivity and hope for the next stages. There’s nothing equal to the feeling of peace / serenity and I hope you continue to feel more of it!
