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Meds, meds, meds

I met with CSMS yesterday. It made an interesting hour – more of a battle of wills. My doctor would like me to go on to naloxone. I get that this is her job, but I still find myself telling her nicely to…. er… cram it.

My family is full to breaking point with heroin addicts. I’m the only one who is committed to breaking the cycle, and apparently this reduces my odds of staying clean? By 90%?? Where do people get these statistics???
Are they made up?

Because ‘statistically’ speaking there’s no two ways about it, I so shouldn’t where I am today. Anyway, thanks doc you’ve made my day, nice one LOVELY, ta (not). Oh, I’m ranting again. The naloxone thing. The whole point is that if you take naloxone and the choice is made for you, how will you ever have the choice to make for yourself?

I mean the right choice – not to use. I’ve already chosen what I wanted to do and I’ve done it. So naloxone might be right for some circumstances, but for me it feels like a big step in the wrong direction. I don’t want the meds.

I choose life! Which is slightly uncomfortable at times, but it’s sure better than what I had to look forward to a few years ago. All of this is a total transformation. Sure I miss some of the madness in an odd sort of way, but for one second I catch myself reminiscing and the grimy film that covers all of the memories reminds me to stay true.

Comments

Now this is interesting. The UKRF have a new slogan for the UK Recovery Walk i.e. We make the path by walking it.

I think that this is, in some ways, what is going to be most challenging for practitioners. Like you I believe the vast majority do their very best but struggle with the concept that the path we take is our choice. And perhaps all the more likely to be the right path because we chose it.

By Michaela on 19/03/2010 at 8:50 PM - .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

Hi there,
I agree with michaela.Don’t do anything you don’t want to as i’m asuming you have got this far sticking to doing what you feel you want! Although i know it’s not easy road.Wish you all the best and hope you get what you want out of life.It just take’s time.Take care of you! C.X

By claire.y on 25/03/2010 at 1:25 AM - .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

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didn't play well with others's photo
didn't play well with others


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Article history
First published on
19/03/2010
Last updated on
19/03/2010

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